Funny short jokes....

Dad's writes on son's Facebook wall: 

"Dear Son, How are you? All are fine here. We miss you a lot. Please!! TURN OFF THE COMPUTER & COME DOWN FOR DINNER!!! 

Why shouldn't you hold a DVD upside down? 

Because the data might fall down. 

Santa to Banta: I don't have an internet connection at home. Can you please copy the internet on this pen drive for me? 

Question: Which day of the week is most hated by fish? 

Answer: Fry Day 

Lady 1: My son is very well behaved. 

Lady 2: How can you say that? Wasn't he arrested and imprisoned for 5 years. 

Lady 1: Yes, but he got out after 2 years for good behavior inside the jail. 

A man in a hotel: Waiter, there is a dead fly in my bean soup. 

Waiter: Oh, the hot soup must have killed it sir. 

Good resolutions are like beautiful girls: they are easy to make but hard to keep. 

Have you ever wondered why Tarzan never has a beard? 

Why do they always use sterilised needles when giving lethal injections? 

Teacher: "Amy, what do you call the outside of a tree?" 

Student: "No idea miss" 

Teacher told angrily: "Bark, Amy". 

Amy: "Bow Wow Wow Miss" 

Girl: Mom, today the teacher beat me for something that I didn't do. 

Mother: That's very bad of your teacher. What was it that you didn't do? 

Girl: The homework. 

Interviewer: Do you think you can handle a variety of work? 

Candidate: Yes I think so, I have worked in 10 different places in the last 3 months. 

Employee: I got to have salary increment. Three other companies are after me. 

Boss: Really? Which are the three companies? 

Employee: The electric company, the telephone company and the gas company. 

My boss walked past my desk and asked me: "Why are you not working?" 

I replied "Because I never saw you coming Sir".